Relation.

It is tempting to look for connections between seemingly random objects in our daily lives. Our human minds are trained to recognize patterns even when none exist. The tendency to assume causality where only chance prevails is a deep-seated cognitive trap that has colored human thinking since ancient times. Yet here I must attempt to prove, in a logical yet roundabout way, that the TV remote control in the living room has no relation whatsoever to the empty shampoo bottle in the bathroom upstairs.

Let’s start with the basics: the TV remote control is a technological artifact that functions primarily through infrared signals or radio waves, with the purpose of controlling electronic devices — particularly televisions. The essential purpose of the remote control is therefore communication between human and device, converting signals into commands such as changing channels, adjusting the volume, or turning the device on and off. The remote control is therefore a product of technological progress, based on fundamental physical principles and electronic systems.

The empty shampoo bottle in the bathroom, on the other hand, belongs to a completely different category of objects. A shampoo bottle is a consumer good designed to contain a liquid care product, the primary function of which is to cleanse the hair. The empty bottle marks the end of the usage process; the moment when the product has been used up and the object has lost its original function. The bottle is therefore essentially a remainder, a remnant of a closed cycle of use, in which it often finds its destination in the waste bin or the recycling process.

Based on these fundamental differences—technological versus consumerist, functional versus residual—one might already conclude that the remote control and the empty shampoo bottle exist in completely different domains of human existence. But to make the evidence fully conclusive, we need to delve into the nature of their interaction, or rather the lack thereof.

The remote control operates in a context of relaxation and entertainment, usually within the living room or bedroom. The shampoo bottle, on the other hand, is mainly located in the intimate, functional space of the bathroom. The physical distance between these two objects is considerable in an average household, with several architectural barriers between them. Even if someone were to take the remote control into the bathroom (an exceptional action), they would still not be able to have any influence on the state of the shampoo bottle. After all, the remote control does not emit any signals that could influence the molecular composition of the shampoo or the material of the bottle.

One might suggest that emptying the shampoo bottle might set off a mental or behavioral chain reaction that indirectly affects the operation or use of the remote control. For example, someone frustrated by an empty shampoo bottle might express that frustration by pressing harder on the buttons on the remote control. But even then, the relationship remains indirect and psychological, not physical or functional. The causal link remains hypothetical and lacks any technological, chemical, or mechanical basis.

What we see here, then, is not merely the absence of a direct relationship, but the fundamental difference in ontological nature between the two objects. The remote control belongs to the world of technology and communication; the empty shampoo bottle to the world of consumption and waste. Their physical and functional separation is so complete that any attempt to suggest a relationship will inevitably end in speculation and semantic gymnastics.

In conclusion, we can say that the remote control and the empty shampoo bottle are not only separated by physical space, but also by functional and ontological categories. Any supposed connection between these objects is an illusion, resulting from the human tendency to seek patterns where there is only chaos and chance. The remote control has nothing, absolutely nothing, to do with the empty shampoo bottle in the bathroom upstairs.